Sex Relationships Books

Even if you've read "The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage," (and if you enjoyed it and found it encouraging!) this book is helpful, informative and inspiring. There are lots of moments in reading this book where the light goes on over your head. Really, this book should be read by anyone who is married, divorced or single--there's something in it for everyone!

I love listening to the audio CD copy of this book.

It's amazing that I felt that some of "my problems" were the fault of my husband and that after listening to Dr Laura I changed my mind. I see that my past had crept into my relationship and that I hadn't considered looking at my marriage in that way before. To make a long story short, I now really want to work on making my marriage happier and healthier for my husband and myself. It really does make a huge difference when I treat my husband well & send some TLC his way. I do not feel as if I am sacrificing anything as some women callers suggest in the book. I feel happier and more loved by my husband. Now that is priceless.

I am looking forward to reading the Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands.

I have not read the book as I gave it as a gift to my son and his fiance. However, I am a loyal listener of Dr. Laura and I know that her books have helped many people. I pray this book will make a difference in my son's marriage.

"You alone can change the destiny of your marriage." ~ Dr. Laura

Dr. Laura begins her book by railing against feminist ideas. Instead she fights for a woman's right to act like a woman and encourages women to appreciate masculinity. Instead of hating men Dr. Laura presents ideas for how you can love men and even depend on men for support. She definitely is in favor of men and women taking more traditional roles, especially if there are children involved. Women are discouraged from working unless the husband can't work and men are encouraged to be the main provider in the family. Dr. Laura supports her views with letters from her listeners.

Your experience may be quite different if you (as a woman) have to work to make ends meet. My husband says I'm happier and more fulfilled when I work so some of the ideas in this book don't work for me. I agreed with a lot of this book but still think Dr. Laura is favoring men. One woman's husband agreed that she could go visit her relatives while he was busy working overtime, then he wanted her back for a social occasion. The woman seemed happy to have returned home to support her husband. While it is fine to change your mind, what about honoring a decision you have made previously?

The best parts of the book are the question and answer sections. Some of the questions included:

What do you, as a man, most admire about women in general?
What do you, as a woman, most admire about men in general?
What is the most important thing you think modern men don't get about being a man?
What is the single, most important expectation you have in a wife?

What bothers me most about this book is how Dr. Laura encourages women to stay home most of the time. She doesn't seem to see the entire arena where women are making a difference in the world by working. What about nurses and teachers for example? Should they never get married or have kids? Even Dr. Laura works!

Some of her other tidbits of advice seem to work in regards to keeping a marriage together. There is a section on divorce that is well worth reading. She shows you how to keep your spouse happy and how to appreciate the differences between men and women. The advice in this book could save your marriage especially if you have been against seeing men and women as being intrinsically different.

"Peace and happiness are the results of loving and giving." ~ Dr. Laura

~The Rebecca Review

A great book for those male or female who want a better understanding of marriage and the differences in the sexes. I bought 3 copies; for myself, and 2 of my adult daughters. This book helps to remind me that when my husband seems alien to me it's because he is a man - not a woman! It is also a good reminder to give all of yourself to your spouse and the miracle of how my attitude and giving love will prompt a more kinder and gentler partner not only in myself but also in my husband.

Uncompromising, cynical and probably correct. Humans are robots programmed by evolutionary sexual strategies. Expect programmed behavior from others. Know thyself or be a robot.

To those who are rather desperately clinging on to their world view despite this book (and it's 1996 earlier version) by criticizing it for lack of scientific rigor, you should realize that this is the popular press version of Baker and Bellis' research and not the academic text. The subject matter is only contoversial by its socially explosive conclusions and not by any questions of its science.

If you really want the solid data to convince you that virtually everything you want to believe is wrong, you should get a copy of Human Sperm Competition: Copulation, Masturbation and Infidelity which is the academic text of their groundbreaking research.

The proper scientific documentation really is there. Our physiology is wildly more complex than most people had believed and clearly did not develop in a sexually pair bonded environment.

Sperm wars dives into many fascinating aspects of our sexuality and how these inherent drives have evolved over time and still control us to a much greater extent than most of us believe.

The book describes concepts using realistic situations and stories, making the book educational as well as exciting to read.

He reveals:
-Why a woman often feels a strong drive for finding the best genes as well as the best provider, and how she will optimize her sexual strategy if she cannot find a man that satisfies both.
-Why gays and bisexuals are actually the result of specific evolutionary survival strategies.
-How rape plays out in humans and other species.
-How most of a man's sperm is actually created to battle other sperm.
-10% of children are have different fathers than they believe.
-A women is far more likely to conceive through an affair rather than with her boyfriend or husband.

I had high hopes for this book after hearing so many of my friends rave about it. However, I was a little let down. First of all, there are no foot-notes or citations for any of the claims/statistics that Baker writes about. I understand that the book reads easier without them, but it takes a lot of the credibility away from the message. Also, the constant referral to previous/future "scenes" (37 small stories) throughout the book really made it difficult to follow.

I read in a couple other reviews for this book that a lot of the "science" Baker writes about has been proved wrong. One of the reviewers actually posted a link to a scientific article which conducted some experiments contradictory to Baker's research, so if you feel inclined it's on this website somewhere.

Anyway, the book did have a couple (valid) discoveries that were new to me, so all was not lost. Just wish Baker had done a better job of backing up his research!

You have to be rather mature to be able to read this book without freaking out. It is so full of brutal honesty with regard to human sexual behaviour. It would be more than easy to just get insecure and try to push it all under the carpet. Only a very strong person can come to terms with the reality of his or her own biological nature. If you read this at face value, it would be a temptation to lose all fatih in human beings. You could spend your life hiding behind hollywood fantasies as to to human nature and the myth of "being in love" as the only truth about sex and love but that would be delusional. Remember that human beings are biology, and this book makes that startingly clear... and that we are also a heart. At the end of the day we are free and we choose our actions. Read with care. This book is scary. VM

I have been in a wonderful relationship with my husband for the last five years. My husband and I both thought that our sexual life together was as good as it could possibly get! We both enjoyed what we had and we were both satisfied after our sexual encounters but once we read Patty's book, Pure Romance Between the Sheets: Find Your Best Sexual Self and Enhance Your Intimate Relationship, we found that even though we were happy before, this book REALLY opened our eyes as to what can and does effect your sexual life. Everyday things that you would think are the furthest from the bedroom are having a negative effect in your bed if your mind is a tangle of the days events and responsibilities and neither you or your partner are letting go. I totally love this book as a woman, wife and mother. Our sex life is beyond anything we thought we had before! Our minds so much more open to what we go through in a day and we even noticed a difference as to how we treat each other as a couple. This book has definitely been a positive thing for not only my sex life but my life in general!

Patty's book is a great way to get some new ideas to bring the romance back into a relationship that is in a sexual slump. It teaches how to introduce toys into the bedroom, and which ones are best ones for you.

Patty uses terms you can understand and is very honest about real issues we face. She answers all the questions you were always afraid to ask.

I love this book! It is very informative. There are so many things that I did not know. I wish Doctors would tell you this stuff. This is a must read for ALL women. Your health depends on it.

As a Pure Romance Consultant I have to say that this book is excellent. Patty Brisben is someone to look up to and she knows exactly what she is talking about. This book will help you with every aspect of your love life that you can think of. It is a must read!!!!

This is quite frankly a disaster from start to finish. I am sad to see that a physicain lent his name to this monstrosity.
If you are looking for a scientific book this is not for you. This book is full of pseudoscience designed to promote a particular philosphical belief. If you are expecting any actual scienctific analysis look elsewhere. If you are seeking pseudoscientific statistics to support your previously prescribed conclusions, this book will help you continue to believe that which you have already decided is true. Please don't misinterpret my statements. There is an important role for teaching Christian values in relation to sexual ethics. Disguising this book as science though is dishonest. I wish I could get my money back. I would post this book for resale, but I would not anyone to have to deal with the nausea one experiences after digesting it.

This is one of the most important books any parent will ever read. Why? In scientific terms (that non-scientists can understand) it lays out the convincing evidence that sexual activity before adulthood/marriage not only can be psychologically and emotionally damaging to men and women, but can create a chemically patterned response in the pre-frontal cortex of the brain, affecting even future relationships. Know a man who goes from woman to woman to woman, unable to commit to any lasting relationship? Have a female friend that consistently chooses bad/abusive men to 'love'? There is no mention of "GOD", or religion, other than in a generalized way, which means that you can feel comfortable in sharing this book both with people of faith and non-religious folk. After reading it the first time, I ordered 5 more copies for friends and family.

A must have for anyone with children, anyone who works with children, or who once upon a time........was a child.

How casual sex is permanently damaging teens brain development and increasing the spread of STDs from a medical view.

It's always good to hear the opinions and advice of a professional. You can be confident that this writer has not only thoroughly researched his subject, but has then presented it in a way that is understandable and usable for the lay person. The approach of this book is meaningful and candid, with a view toward fixing problems that married people are bound to experience at one time or another. Using his personal experience as well as patient examples, the author clearly states the problem and creatively supplies a solution. Pair this splendid book with The Sensuous Couple's (Flip Over) Guide to Seismic Oral Sex, which addresses some of the same issues and problems, but from a more specific vantage point. Oral sex is a great way for a married couple to express their intimacy and get to know each other better, and requires a degree of trust that will enhance any bond. Both books would benefit a troubled relationship.

The fifty pages in Part II are the core content of this book. They offer a comforting view of the difficult side of marriage - the long term, committed relationship where sex is dead or dying. I say "comforting" because Schnarch maps out the progression of a relationship in a way where you can see that the fluctuations in the passion and intimacy couples feel for each other are part of the natural growth cycle of a marriage. What sometimes feels like the end of a relationship is actually a trigger for the next growth cycle, for the individual and the couple. Through various examples using couples from his practice and his own marriage, he offers encouragement and practical advice to help couples through this sometimes difficult and frustrating cycle of a marriage.

The tone of Schnarch's writing is more down to earth, like advice from a friend, compared with his other book "Passionate Marriage" which is also excellent but sometimes sounds a little preachy in comparison. This more personal tone, plus use of examples from his own life experience make this book like a personal consultation with Dr. Schnarch.

I started buying these series of books for my 18 yr old daughter. She never really liked to read but I was hopeful she might take an interest in what Gossip Girl was about. Thank goodness she did! Believe it or not for the 1st time she thoroughly enjoys each book in the series and can't wait to tell me what is happening. Im guessing she relates to alot of what is going on, and Im thrilled she has taken such a huge interest.

In this third installment in the GOSSIP GIRL series S & B have finally reconciled and the island of Manhattan will never be the same! Serena is being courted by a famous musician whose advances quickly become unwelcome and Blair is having trouble getting over her failed romance with Nate. Meanwhile, Dan and Vanessa are heating things up but how often does a romance between friends really work out? And Nate and Jenny have a good thing but will it survive Christmas break as thoughts of Blair and Christmases past come creeping back into Nate's head?

I have really enjoyed the first two books in this series but I found this one to be a bit more filler than substance. Hopefully this is just a lead in for better things to come.

This novel is my first venture into the Gossip Girl series, and I found myself pleasantly surprised. While the wealthy, popular characters of Serena and Blair are supposedly the main draw, he "outsider" characters (Jenny and Aaron) are compassionately drawn and interesting to follow. The plot meanders without building up as much tension as I'd like, but I was willing to forgive the author for that thanks to her occasionally gorgeous turns of phrase and character insights. She also drops enough smart-chick references-- to artists, literary authors, and the like-- that I respected the mind behind the story. I'm looking forward to reading more books in the series.

Blair Waldorf is having the worst time of her life. She has just completely flubbed her Yale interview, even going so far as to kiss her interviewer; she must contend with a dreadlock-bearing new stepbrother named Aaron, who seems to have some ulterior motives up his sleeve; her mother is marrying a loser whom she has known for hardly no time at all; and, to top it all off, Nate has ditched her for a chesty ten-year-old - well, she looks ten. Luckily, she and Serena van der Woodsen are back on speaking terms, and living it up as BFF's once more. But who knows how long that will last.

The holidays are just around the corner, and with the Upper East Side absolutely freezing, everyone who's loaded is planning on ditching their Marc Jacobs coats, and slipping into their Missoni string bikinis for a Christmas in a tropical place. With Nate Archibald having called it quits with Blair in order to take up a romance with freshman Jenny Humphrey, Blair is anything but ready to say goodbye to the city, and head off to St. Bart's with Serena, where they can sunbathe topless, and, perhaps, have a winter fling. Unfortunately, Serena is being stalked by Flow, the hottest rock star on the planet - at least at the moment - and can't seem to shake him off, and Blair, armed with her iBook plans on holing up in the hotel room writing the essay for her Yale application. Looks like this vacation won't be as sizzling as originally planned. But with Blair's new stepbrother, Aaron, and his pal Miles in tow, you never know when the sparks will fly.

Back in the city, Nate and Jenny are having the time of their life. But with Blair's sudden appearances at every turn, Nate finds himself more and more drawn to the girl he has known and loved for so many years. But then there's Jenny. Sweet, innocent, voluptuous Jenny. Maybe if Nate spent less time being baked, and more time being straight, he'd be able to decide who he's truly lusting over.

Then there's Jenny's older brother, Dan. Since admitting their passion for one another, Dan and Vanessa have been having a whirlwind romance - albeit a dark one - filled with foreign films, cigarettes, strong instant coffee, and lots and lots of black. But since falling in love, Dan finds himself at a standstill regarding his poetry. Suddenly, he's experiencing writer's block firsthand, and it's not a pretty picture. But when Vanessa supposedly does something that betrays both him and Jenny, he wonders if this is the push he needs to get his writing back on track - and to get even.

Three books down, and still Cecily von Ziegesar is going strong; creating intoxicating storylines that leave you craving more, and dying to find out what will happen to S, B, N, and the rest of the gang. Finally Blair and Serena are back to their old tricks, partying 'till the break of dawn, and hamming it up for the cameras. While their friendship is a beautiful thing, and it's wonderful to see them back on speaking terms, the fact that they're not at each other's throats any longer kind of makes the reader miss their feuding; however, their gossip fests about their friends, and their many shopping sprees certainly make up for their catfights. Jenny is still the sweet girl we all know and love from GOSSIP GIRL and YOU KNOW YOU LOVE ME; but in AS LONG AS WE'RE TOGETHER, she finally seems to be growing up a bit, and it's nice to see her stand up for herself for once, and not allow people to push her around. Her relationship with her brother, Dan, seems to have changed slightly. Suddenly, he's watching her every move, and not being as friend-like towards her. Instead, seeming more like a jail warden. But, no matter what, you can't help but love each and every one of them - even the slightly creepy Miles, who seems to be stalking Blair. Of course, the installment wouldn't be complete without Gossip Girl reporting straight from...wherever, giving us all the lowdown on what it takes to be a part of the In Crowd, and providing us with the status of every move all of our favorite characters take. As breathtaking as a first kiss.

Erika Sorocco
Freelance Reviewer

So... I got this book after reading the prequel, gossip girl, and then reading You Know You Love Me. I think the Gossip Girl series is so addicting, you can't help but fall in love. Basically, in this book.... everyone is just getting finished with their essays and SATs and exams and getting worried about college. If that isn't bad enough, Blair has a whole new "extended" family and is being wisked off to some island with them. I personally like this book because Blair and Serena are done being catty and have actually grown to love each other again! Serena met a rock-star named Flow and hung out for one night. Now she has a professional STALKER! Serena, Blair, Aaron, Tyler, Mr and Mrs. Rose, Miles, Flow and many others are going to St. Barts and we soon discover Aarons secret longing for Blair. Jenny and Nate are caught fooling around in Central Park and a video of them is posted on the internet! (Now, I wonder who we know has a video camera strapped to their hip?) Nate flys off with his parents to Maine hoping to be able to light a few joints and get away from stalker Jenny ( who i have now grown to hate for being such a nate-obsessed, annoying.. JERK!) who is stuck at home and being watched closely by Rufus and Dan. This book altogether is starting to form bonds between characters you NEVER expected to be bonded and altogher it has been one of my favorites. I mainly just gave it four stars because of some minor typos and how much Jenny has grown to annoy me. =] Im not always this compulsive... dont worry! ;) I would recomend this book to anyone and this is a lot more appropriate for people under 15 than the last books have been! I hope you enjoyed my review! Go ahead and read it! The worst that will happen is that you wont like the book and will put it down early... right?

Hope I didn't give TOO much away,
<3 tAyLoR =]

Infidelity is a life altering event for most people and can be a horrible thing to try and find reconcilation with. This book offers insight into the many different aspects of it. It can't change the situation for the people who are the dealing with this issue but it does help to answer some of the millions of questions that plaque the minds of those afflicted by this most heartbreaking event. It is certainly worth the time it takes to read.

This book is truly a "How to" on getting through what may well be the worst time in your life. It is written in plain language and offers advice on other reading and selecting a therapist, if you feel that you need one. No one expects to find themselve in this situation and this is a great guide to help you deal with the pain and move forward.

I thought this book was a tremendous resource in helping me better understand my perspectives on my relationship. It provides valuable information that helps the reader develop language for positive communication, and also offers insight that can be helpful in trying to understand your mate's feelings and motivations. It helped me organize my thoughts and gave me the vocabulary to clearly define my emotions, my expectations, and my situation. I would recommend this book to anyone who has had an affair, who has considered an affair, and especially to any individual whose mate has had an affair.

This book lays out a very tough subject in an approachable way. I felt much better after reading this guide. As the recently betrayed I was looking for so many answers, and this book pointed me in the right direction. My cheating spouse also found this a helpful, "easy" read.

This is a brief and succinct book on the subject of infidelity. While much of the material is addressed to couples experiencing marital difficulties, the counsel and advice provided is helpful to unmarried couples in long term relationships also. Too often, the term "infidelity" is used as a polite euphemism for adultery. While infidelity can include adultery, a more narrow term which has both legal and moral implications, infidelity is really a much broader concept that relates to betrayal, disloyalty and faithlessness. Infidelity is all about breaching trust. As Lusterman correctly observes, while adultery always involves illicit sexual activities in violation of marital vows for at least one of the parties in the triangle, infidelity can encompass even purely emotional affairs that do not necessarily include sexual intimacy in all instances. Someone who maintains that a long time confidant is just "a good friend" may very well be involved in infidelity nonetheless by violating the exclusivity of another relationship with an innocent third person. One may be engaged in infidelity through dishonesty and unfaithfulness alone. Since communication is a key element to the success of any meaningful relationship, constant lying or omitting to speak the truth often rises to the level of infidelity. While many couples are able to rehabilitate their relationships by renewing communications after an episode of infidelity is exposed and improve themselves in the process, Lusterman warns that such recoveries are impossible with offending individuals who fail to admit their faults despite evidence to the contrary and who refuse to express any remorse for the harm that their actions have caused to others. The best one can do in these instances is to admit the obvious and move forward. Lusterman has a doctoral degree and a lengthy career record as a therapist. This concise book addresses the pain and shock that often accompanies the discovery of infidelity, often after lengthy periods of suspicion, and methods for coping with the hurt and recovering a sense of one's own self esteem. In an era in which many people rely upon the Internet to maintain regular communications and in which long distance relationships are increasingly common as a result, one needs to be prepared. Bad things sometimes do happen to good people. Lusterman's book is a valuable reference tool. It may even serve to promote a sense of healing for some people who have been victims of infidelity and allow them to forgive those who committed the acts of infidelity.

Ordered for my boss. Arrived quickly. He really enjoyed this gift and I am sure it will help him in the future! Thanks!

The book is very good, it has some good tips and almost every chapter goes straight to the point, although the chapters are too short. It really show me a different way of how to approach a women; I recommend it!!!

About a year ago, I began reading various pick-up artist material, including Neil Strauss' The Game, The Mystery Method by Mystery, and From the Bar to the Bedroom by the editors of AskMen.com. The information in those books was quite useful, but I felt the material that pick-up artists use didn't fit my personality. I tried using that material on a few ladies, and it seemed so unnatural and uncomfortable to me. I successfully creeped out a few of them. I felt like an actor reading from a horrible script. Plus, don't get me started on "the seven hour rule." Sex happens when she wants it to happen. You can't force it on her.

Every guy is different. He must use the strengths in his personality to become successful with women. What I like about this book is that tells you what not to do, what to do, what is going through her mind, and what she expects you to do. All you need to have is a decent personality, and the information in the book will guide you the rest of the way.

The book is nothing more than common sense that guys tend to overlook. The chapters are short and to the point. I read the whole thing in about two hours. By the way, she is hilarious but right, sadly.

If you had a bad role model growing up or your dad taught you absolutely nothing about women, I strongly suggest this book and only this book. It's all you really need. Please, don't buy into the whole PUA thing. The next book you should buy should be on tantric sex.

This is almost exactly what I have been telling my male clients about successfully dating women (and having great sex with them). By utilizing the techniques and strategies outlined in the book you will dramatically increase your chances of "scoring". Highly recommended!

Finally, A book on dating written by a woman.So far, reading whatRomy Miller has to say regarding what women expect from men is right on target. Some chapters are short, while others are longer. She has a in your face, tell it like it is, no B.S. approach. It's verymotavational. If you never try, how will you ever ever know if the woman you want to date will say yes or no kind of thing. It's not how good-looking you are or how rich you may be. What you really need is confidence. Some maysay a lot of it is "common sense", thatis not the case here. Many guys make the same mistakes over and over again.With this book, you will told what to do, what not to do, etc. I'm not quite finished reading the whole book, it's only 160+ pages. But so far, it's easy to understand and Romy's info is down to earth real. The only thing she doesn't get into is how to find the right woman. Great reading for men who need help understanding women.

The author gives a very clear understanding of the emotional needs (not feelings) being sought after by those involved in an affair. The reading is concise and easy. An excellent book for counseling people who want to rebuild a marriage, despite an affair. An excellent resource for Christian counselors.

As a former betrayed spouse, this book was responsible for protracting extreme pain and agony. I watched my spouse cheat and cheat, and I pretended to "understand." I didn't lovebust. Until finally, I kicked him out of the house and severed all communications. He came back, only to do it again - same woman. Once again, I tossed him out, only this time, I moved on with my own life. He finally came back for good. But I can tell you, I could have saved a lot of time and heartache if I would have just kicked him out when I first found out. No one, but *NO ONE* should have to live under the same roof as a cheater. No one wants a doormat! No one wants someone they disrespect. If you were cheating on someone and they were all nicey-nicey and let you stick around, wouldn't you think they were an incredible simp? Of course you would! Would you ever really respect them? Heck, no!

OTOH, the advice to the cheaters is excellent, particularly the method in which the affair is to be terminated. The goodbye letter should be a template for every person getting out of an affair, as well as the subsequent behavior (no contact with the ex-lover, moving if necessary, taking a new job if the ex-lover is in the workplace). Harley's advice on that count was absolutely flawless. If you can get it used or at the library, this book is worth it, to see how a cheater *should* make it up to his spouse.

This book disgusted me. Not only did it justify the cheating spouse's behavior but it placed the majority of the blame for the affair and responsibility for repairing the marriage on the betrayed spouse! I purchased this book at a Christian bookstore, therefore was very dissappointed in the approach taken. The approach taken in this book discourages guilt on the part of the infidel and encourages tolerance on the part of the betrayed spouse. The "prescription" for recovery outlined in this books requires the betrayed spouse to show no anger and walk on eggshells in an effort to prevent upsetting the cheating spouse and forcing him or her back into the affair. It makes me feel like this book was an effort to justify the author's own actions and has only added to the depression and dissappointment I am already experiencing due to my husband's infidelity. Thank God, my husband is repentant and not as callous as the infidels given as examples in this book or we wouldn't have a snowball's chance in hell of restoring our marriage.

This is a good book with alot of valid points. I bought it in an attempt to save my marriage after my husband left and had an affair. Unfortunately, I tried plan A, then went to plan B. Because I used Dr Harvey's plans, it pushed my husband to file divorce papers. It doesn't say in the book what to do if that happens. I'm back to square one now trying to figure out what to do to rescue my marriage from divorce and put my family back together. Dr Harvey's book is great for those who are just dealing with a partner who had an affair and hasn't left home. I am now looking for other ways of trying to save my marriage.

I read this book within a day of the time I learned of my husbands affair. We are on a steady road of recovery and rebuilding our marriage. This book was our saving grace. Had I not read this book I would have thrown my husband out without hesitation. This book helped me to see the possibilty of marital recovery. I highly reccomend this book to anyone suffering through the agony of an affair.

After being with my husband for 7 years, we seem to row over the silliest and smallest thing. I knew my relationship is not going well. Having found this book on the internet, I decided to give it a try.

I have to say this book is purely based on research on what makes couples happy or unhappy. Communication is very important and I liked the "relationship bank account", which I found very true. I have applied the knowledge and recommendation and even after a week, my marriage has turned around for the best and we are enjoying a very fruitful relationship now.

It is a very good book for couples and I think it should be mandatory to people prior to marriage. I will certainly highly recommend it to friends and family.

Another good book : Joseph Bailey "Slowing down to the speed of love".

This book is based upon an innovative, revolutionary twenty-year study. It is a simple-to-understand and clearly-worded guide that provides you with straightforward, scientifically demonstrated techniques that can help you make your relationship work.

At the heart of the concepts presented by authors Clifford Notarius, Ph.D., and Howard Markman, Ph.D., is their "Better Talk" program. This program is unique among communication improvement practices. Better Talk builds upon the foundation set up in the introduction of the book. It permits couples to understand how to communicate using respect and shared understanding, especially when having conversations of a problem-solving nature. Instead of arguing with one another, couples discover how to work together to tackle their problems. Couples learn how to work on the same team, and to use constructive interaction instead of anger.

What truly stands out about this book is that instead of focusing on what makes a relationship fail, We Can Work It Out instead looks at what makes a couple succeed. To determine what the key elements of successful relationships actually are, the authors dedicated 20 years to studying relationships and what makes them work. Their key finding: A happy and successful relationship is based upon the couple's capacity to work through their differences, not actually on the individuals themselves.

By using diagnostic questionnaires, examples, and easy-to-understand explanations, We Can Work It Out very practically and realistically helps you to identify your problem areas and patterns, and to use the techniques outlined in the book in your own unique situation and relationship.

Though this book does tend to feel as though it is dating itself on occasion. The authors frequently refers to their findings and writing in the early 1990's. However, the lessons here are in no way obsolete. The findings of We Can Work It Out remain just as accurate, relevant, and current as they were when they were first printed.

This book provides you with a useable, optimistic, and realistic management approach for dealing with the issues troubling your relationship. It provides a levelheaded, sensible way to find your way back to the happiness you were once able to enjoy when your relationship was better fulfilling your needs.

This book has changed my life! It was a very emotional read for me, I read so many examples of relationship communication problems I had throughout my life. I closed up or withdrew when relationship problems surfaced. I was afraid to talk and held everything inside. The book explains communication difficulties, it tells you how to effectively work through them and also how to prevent it from happening in the future. The book relates to any relationship you're in, whether you're married or dating. I wish I found this book years ago, I didn't seek help until it was too late. I recently dated someone for a little over two years, we broke up once and got back together, but we had the same problems, poor communication. If I knew about this book sooner, I know my outcome would have changed! Don't make the same mistake I did and think it'll get better, read this book now to become a better person and learn how to effectively communicate with your mate.

This book is easy to read, easy to understand, and offers a lot of hope. It gives you real tools to use. I wish it had focused just a tiny bit more on how you can only take care of yourself and your own point of view and emotions - or perhaps it would have been nice if they recommended a companion book on that subject - since it is such a large factor in relating. But overall I'd say it's a great buy for anyone looking to find ways to start improving their communication with anyone, right away.

My husband and I separated after years and years of the same problems that we couldn't resolve. Realizing that perhaps it's not just what we are saying to each other but HOW we are saying it, I bought 6 books on communication. This was hands down the best one.

The first part of this book is a little slow, as it deals with research on couples and commonalities among happy and unhappy couples, blah, blah, blah. The 2nd and 3rd part of the book are the real meat of it. This book is excellent at not only helping you identfy the dysfunctional communication patterns you and your partner use, but also to determine WHY you use them. Most importantly, once you understand what NOT to do, this book tells you exactly what to DO in order to have successful communications with your partner. This book was an absolute eye-opener and my perception of my husband and his perspective has done a complete 180.

Now don't get me wrong, this book isn't going to do the work for you. You still have to commit to being open-minded enough to see YOUR faults in communication, not just be looking for everything wrong with your mate. However, I did see a lot of my mate in this book but instead of giving me ammo against him, this book really helped me understand him better. Also, this plan will be work. Changing old habits is ALWAYS hard work. But, my gosh...isn't it worth it? I can't stress enough though the importance of taking a hard look at yourself first. You have to be willing to consider that your partner has been just as hurt in your relationship as you have...and that you have caused as much destruction as you feel your partner has caused.

I have asked my husband to read the book. I don't know if he will. If he does, this book may very well save our marriage. Either way, I'm going to implement what I've learned into my own every day life. Because, if things don't work out with my husband, I need to be a healthier partner for any future relationships...and I need to be healthier for ME. I do have to say though, that reading this book has given me real hope that my marriage can be saved. Sadly, it shows me how unnecessary a lot of our pain has been. Every therapist tells you to talk about it but no one ever teaches you HOW to talk about it. You will be amazed how much HOW you talk is really what's going on in your relationship conflicts.

Every couple should have to read and discuss this book before they are allowed to get married. In fact, I may make this book my standard wedding gift from now on. In the end, where did all of those china place-settings ever get anyone? This book would be a real gift! I can not recommend this book more highly. If you are searching for books on this subject, than you need this book. Buy it now. Read it with an open heart. Share it with your mate. Good luck.

(Also, another great book to read to just better understand the many dynamics of all communication is Messages by McKay, Davis & Fanning...this book was also very helpful and I recommend it as a companion to We Can Work It Out. If you are dealing with an affair, "Not Just Friends" was the best of the several I read. That one deals with emotional affairs (which was my situation), not just sexual affairs.)