Sex Relationships Books

I would reccomend to read this book to all people involved into any kind of relationships. It's not all Q&As but it's a real and logical view on many "mystical" things that we often shy away from.

The book was very eye opening. Where I had previously labeled my self as 'Co-dependent' I can now see where it is truly another addition of MINE in my life. I had felt almost a superiority in wearing the 'Co-dependent' hat, and can see after reading this book how it is a mask that was hiding my own addiction. Now I have to do the work.

It was easy to read and very realistic - the examples were very helpful for me to see my own patterns in creating relationships. My favorite section began on page 103 " The following are some of the skills used to form pseudo- (addictive) relationships."... I am an expert at 9 out of 10 of the skills and previously thought that I was just a nice person, good friend, etc...

Great book.

This book was helpful to me, although I felt the author was still working out her issues of control in her writing. The author spoke extensively about the 12 step program and how invaluable it was to recovery, but it seems that she is still stuck around two or three. Relinquishing self-will is vital to emotional development. Not only did the author try to suggest that polygamy was a much more acceptable and reasonable concept for relationships in the coming future, she refused to acknowledge God in her recitation of the twelve steps but instead chose to refer to him as a Process. Of course as an author she is entitled to write as she desires, but based on the topic on which she chose to write I was surprised at her single-minded desire to impose her views upon the reader, rather than offering the advice along with other alternatives and allowing the reader to decide

Anne Wilson Schaef is one of those rare people with the gift of understanding women in modern American culture. The insight in her books is nothing short of genius.

reading this short book has changed my life. i found myself detailed in practically every page. having experienced several failed relationships and a generally "unlucky in love" sort of life, i recognized myself in these profiles of sex, romance, and relationship addicts who form "pseudo relationships" that are designed to keep the addict from knowing her true self. Schaef, a recovered "pseudo relationship" addict, details all the tricks of this disease, which is a progressive and fatal addiction like all other addictions (drugs, alcohol).

if you think this statement sounds like malarky, read Schaef's book to see how true it is! Addiction serves to alter a person's mood or perception. This can be accomplished without drugs or alcohol. Relationship addiction is a "process addiction," whereby the addict spends his or her time focusing on an external stimulus (the relationship) instead of taking care of their Self! Most useful is Schaef's list of behaviors exhibit by sex, romance, or relationship addicts. I found myself in nearly every one!

This constellation of addictions is tricky to detect because the very skills to support the addiction "appear" to be relationship skills AS TAUGHT on tv, movies, in the general folklore of our culture. Which, as Schaef explains, is an addictive society, so it reinforces our addictive behaviors. These process addictions are VERY common, and at the heart of other conditions such as depression, anxiety, etc.

DO NOT BE FOOLED...cynics may read this review and find what I've written here to be self-help/new-age gibberish. Schaef's book is very short (158 pp.), extrememly readable, totally lucid, and very clearly organized, with information that builds on itself in an expert, lockstep manner.

I HIGHLY recommend this book to anyone who suffers in relationships. If you have failed relationship after failed relationship, or are in an abusive situation, or feel compelled to lie/cheat/distort the truth to maintain a relationship, or have any other self-realized behavior that you know is unhealthy but don't know what is "wrong," PLEASE READ THIS BOOK.

I believe this book will have a life-changing affect on anyone who reads it and relates to the information within. After all, the disease of addictive relationships is a disease of relating: we are not relating to people, but to our fantasies of what "relationships" SHOULD be.

I have bought this book for the third and final time. I have even bought this book for friends. It's a great book to read when you are getting out of a relationship and are feeling a bit discouraged in the self-esteem department. Keep it handy, read a few pages at a time and motivate yourself!

This book is so real, cuts through the b.s., and tells women what is essential for keeping sane in our relationships with men.

I picked up "What Smart Women Know" in a bookstore about 15 years ago, when I was 21 and in a bad relationship. I have kept this book, and I know it has helped me through many other relationships, over the past 15 years.

I am not even going to cite sayings from the book, because I couldn't do it justice that way.

I feel lucky I wandered into that book store and grabbed this book. I have read many other self-help/relationship books, and they did not help me in any way near as much as "What Smart Women Know"

I think many of us would ultimately get the love we deserve if we paid atttention to much of the advice in this book.

Go get it, Sisters!

I am a smart professional woman who has (and still is) learning the "hard way" about relationships. This book is an awesome resource for a quick pick-me-up. It's super easy to read ... You can turn to any page and start reading without being lost. I've "doggy-eared" so many pages that I want to remember so I can flip to them quickly. It's full of one-liner realities that you never think of, but they make a whole lot of sense. Some of my favorites: "Smart women know that a woman's most powerful sense is her sense of self;" or "Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want;" and "Smart women have the sense to appreciate a man who has no interesting problems."

I am buying this book for all of my single (and should-be-single) girlfriends for their birthdays... Whether they want it or not! It's a must-read for women who are in the bad habit of not valuing themselves enough in relationships.

I highly recommend it!! I carry it in my purse!

I bought this book for the first time after my first marriage ended (should have read the book before I married him). Not long after, I thought I was in love with a man who had some interesting problems. Thank goodness I read the book and realized that I couldn't help him. I've given multiple copies of this book away and have loaned it out to many others. It's currently on loan to a friend who is going through a divorce. I'm married to a wonderful man and I like to flip through the book just to remind myself how lucky I really am to have a man who loves me and respects me. He understands me and I understand him. I love being a smart woman because I'm a happy woman. I'm about to order this book for my niece. She doesn't yet know what smart women know.

I selected this book for my 16 year old daughter a few months ago because she has a boyfriend who was doing and saying things that made her uncomfortable. She devoured it and made many notations in the margins. Since then, she has asked me to order the book for two female friends. She became very empowered by the straight forward advise given in the book and seemed relieved to finally be able to solidify her priorites. We are a family that models healthy relationships, but sometimes teens need various forms of healthy support in order to make values clear(church, teachers, mentors). This book was one of those sources for my daughter.

This is a wonderful book about dealing with life issues. I found the test not that helpful but the text more than supplied what you need to know. This book really addresses all relationships and is extremely helpful in assisting you in realizing why you repeat the same behavior over and over and what you can do to change your approach.

The author did a great job explaining the laws of attraction with examples and helpful suggestions. So much more is offered than in The Secret ...this will be a best seller.
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Finding this book was a great help to me, as it articulated so many things that I was trying to explain to my husband.

The central insight, from my point of view, is that everyone has to remember what the goal is...a happy marriage. The whole use of the word 'fault" is ironic, meant to get us past the point-counting and into the place where everyone is trying to live the marriage he or she wants, the happy, sexy, relaxed and appreciative one.

Unfortunately, defensive and unhappy people are not the ideal audience for irony. They just aren't. I suspect Mr. Alter remembers that well in his practice, but this is written more to peers, so he leaves in jokes that people in trouble may not understand as jokes, such as the title.

If your wife is 'fed up', gentlemen, use this book to help you figure out why. She didn't just hire the cutest poolboy in town and have you join an extra bowling league. She brought you a book. She's [b]working[/b] on it. If you work on it, too, she'll attribute it to the book and feel successful. If you argue about it, she'll feel unsuccessful. And unsuccessful and argued with isn't hot. That's the kind of strategy suggested in this book...and it will work.

If you'd rather be right than get laid, go ahead and argue. If your woman is bi-polar, or a shopping addict, or something, this won't help. If she isn't crazy to start with, it won't hurt.

See how easy this is?

I admit, as a husband, I am not perfect; I have my flaws. My wife recently came across this book and now it has become her relationship bible. Problem is she has her flaws too (no one is perfect). This book directs all the blame at the guy and tells the women their husband is wrong-always wrong.

This "self help" book has caused more stress and fights between us than before she started reading it. Every wife deserves her prince but this book has pounded into her head that I must be her Prince Leopold and that if I fail to ride home on a white horse with a bouqet or flowers in hand every night after a hard day at work then something is wrong with me and I do not love her. Nonsense. I finally asked her to stop reading and refering to it.

What the author fails to realize is that it takes two to make a marriage work. We BOTH have flaws and again, no one is perfect.

Browsing the Humor section at the local Borders Express, I came across this delicious work of farce by humorist Robert Mark Alter. I laughed until my ribs hurt, and eagerly await Alter's next gut-buster.

Rather than attempt to place "fake" characters in a "real" world (as in a satire like "Thank You for Smoking"), Alter has decided to go all the way into farce and create his own "fake" world to accompany his screwball characters, much like the dumbed-down world of dustbowl-era Mississippi which the Cohen brothers created in "O Brother, Where Art Thou?" The result is nothing short of pure comic genius.

In this wacky world, women are presented as morally infallible and superior in every way to their Morlock-like male counterparts. Although the slug-brained males in Alter's world seem hardly able to tie their shoes without strangling themselves with the laces, they are still considered intelligent enough to bear total responsibility (and, by extension, total culpability) for any shortcomings in their dealings with their omniscient female benefactors. The twist is, this same level of responsibility is conspicuously absent from the supposedly-perfect females, even though they are purported to be eons ahead in intelligence, maturity and ability.

Ironically, this total imbalance of moral standards enables the female characters to throw off all inhibitions and standards, and act in the most irresponsible manner without fear of consequences, all the while clinging to this doctrine of equality (much like the Pig in Orwell's "Animal Farm" was "more equal" than the other farm animals, whom he was selling out to the farmer). Alter reaches a level of insanity worthy of Alice in Wonderland on the subject of money. The woman, who for some reason does not have to work in this totally-equal society (brilliant!), goes out and spends hundreds of dollars on clothes she doesn't need. The man is forbidden from getting angry, but is taught to praise the woman for her assertiveness. However, the man now cannot afford to buy other things, so the woman leaves him. Conclusion? It was his fault. Not sure exactly how, but it was.

This idea is genius on its own merits, but Alter ratchets up the comic ante by presenting this book not as fiction, as one would expect with such an obviously outrageous premise (after all, what mature, non-institutionalized woman would actually view herself as infallible?), but as a self-help book for these imbecilic men. Amazingly, he accomplishes this with a literary "straight face" that demands that the reader take him seriously. Max Brooks used this same tone in the equally hilarious "Zombie Survival Guide," and Alter's use of it here actually makes the mayhem even more comical. He even starts out the first chapter with the statement: "This book is not about male-bashing. Don't even think of going there!" I chuckle as I imagine Grog the caveman shrinking back as if poked with a red-hot spear, forgetting to wipe the drool from his mouth. Ted Kennedy could start a book by saying, "How dare you even SUGGEST I have a drinking problem!", and it wouldn't be as funny as this.

I hope this wonderful debut means more psychotic works of comedy are in the works from this warped but amazing new funnyman. I'm always looking for good ways to escape the reality of life for a few hours.

The book's only good premise is that it holds guys responsible for how they behave. Most of us do act like dolts at times, but unfortunately I don't think the guys he's trying to get through to are the kinds of guys that will pick up this book.

It's the complete lack of holding the woman accountable for how the relationship does that bothers me. He takes the stance of "Guys, it's all your fault" which is complete nonsense. It takes two to succeed, it takes two to fail. It essentially gives the woman permission to behave as outrageously as she desires, while the guy has to internalize it all, stand above it, and 'suck it up'.

If I were a woman reading this book, I'd be mad as hell. He essentially lets women believe they are out of control creatures incapabable of self responsibility, of controlling their own behavior. Is your wife having an affair? Must be your fault. Is your wife drinking too much, getting involved in drugs? Must be your fault. This book is essentially the antithesis of Dr. Laura's "The Care and Feeding of Husbands", and equally outrageous.

If you're a guy that's either married to a woman with a personality disorder and/or a control freak, then this book will set you up for failure. He just reinforces the notion that it's all the guy's fault, which is nonsense.

This book is ideal for women who wish their husbands would treat them with a little more kindness and respect, but who feel too intimidated to insist on it.

After reading it, I did four things.

(1) I told my husband that I no longer though of him as "imperfect," but instead as being "90% perfect". I said he's not an abuser, adulterer, or an addict; he works hard for the family; he loves us; he would die for us; he has tremendous integrity; etc. He really appreciated hearing this from me, instead of just another bitter round of tears and "I'm so unhappy."

(2) I told him I was committed to focusing on that remaining 10%--to building a 100% great marriage.

(3) I stopped blaming myself for his behavior and started insisting on kind, respectful treatment from him at all times--not in an angry way, but in a patient, compassionate (but always persistent) way. Any time he said something casually disrespectful, I would calmly say, "I need an apology, or else we need to talk about this."

(4) For the first time in 20 years of marriage, I started using the word "man" when referring to my husband. I have always, "You are a great husband, you are a great father, you are a great guy," etc., but I am amazed at how gratifying it is to my husband when I say "You are such a good man."

Since reading the book a year ago, I have been constantly (or so it felt to me) insisting on apologies and changes in my husband's behavior. Occasionally I would hesitate before speaking up, thinking, "Can he deal with yet another of my demands for change?" But then recently, my husband amazed me by remarking, "I think the reason our marriage is so much better is because ever since you read that book, you have finally started to appreciate me." Wow!

It is a 2-steps-forward, 1-step-backward process, but we are happier than we have ever been in our marriage. I am so greatful to Robert Mark Alter for helping me appreciate the good man I am married to, and for encouraging me to speak up and insist on respect and kindness at all times.

So many spend their dating lives going through a tiresome routine that leaves them both emotionally and spiritually drained. "Doing Things Right in the Matters of the Heart" is a Christian influenced guide for dating, written especially for those in turmoil over the matter. With advice for both men and women trying to find the one person with whom can they settle down and have a long, healthy relationship, "Doing Things Right in the Matters of the Heart" is highly recommended for Christian singles everywhere.

If you are not married yet, just married or married for 23 years, like myself, you would benefit from Mr. Ensor's clear explanation and application in the roles of Christ and his bride (the church)and the husband and his wife..........sacrifice and submission.
Throughout the book I was convicted of my lack of womanhood in the times I don't let my husband lead either by squashing him with my own passiveness or in my desire for control.
I am incredibly thankful that I am married to a Godly man who takes his role to lead through sacrifice seriously.

This is one of the best books I have ever read in my life. Practical and to the point. Nothing spared in regards to facts and references of the Word. Love the Shakespeare too. Ive since passed this book on to friends and it has been flying all over the country like the "traveling pants". Thanks for this helpful book. I recommend any single person about to be engaged or even married already to read this book to help you get on track and stay on track.

This book is refreshingly revolutionary, disarmingly candid, and expertly succinct. It is an excellent primer on a complementary approach to masculinity and femininity. It is less daunting than the similarly-themed Piper and Grudem classic Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, making it easier to both read and recommend.

Ensor addresses a wide range of topics for a relatively short book, including sociological trends, singleness, sexual purity, and marriage. These are all discussed in the context of explaining patterns of biblical manhood and womanhood. Ensor writes with warmth, understanding, clarity, and humor. It is obvious that his knowledge of these topics has been forged in the trenches of real life.

Tim Challies, part of whose review is featured on the back of the book, writes that "this book is a refreshing reminder of the Bible's simple wisdom governing love, relationships, marriage, and matters of the heart." In essence, Doing Things Right... is just that - a light shed on the simple wisdom already in the Bible in reference to these matters. It is worth reading whether you are single or married, young or old.

Doing Things Right in Matters of the Heart by John Ensor

There are very few necessary books, and fewer still are those necessary books that can be called relevant. John Ensor's newest book is both. It's necessary because the practical ramifications of living out biblical gender roles are so weighty. It's relevant because these ramifications are being mutated into grave consequences in our postmodern, subjectivist world where gender and coupling issues are consigned to each individual's heart. This in turn has led to diastrous outcomes for the young men and women of our generation, a Christian generation of passive, wimpy men and of aggressive women. Relationships formed between men and women who've confused their God-given roles and/or altogether forsaken them have unleashed upon the world's greater stage (at the massive expense of a clear gospel witness) singles seeking romantic fulfillment in all the wrong ways and marrieds breeding discontentment rather than fulfilled families.

Ensor's little book is a breezy, humorous, at times confrontational, somewhat rigorous, and always Scripturally motivated theological exercise on what it means to affirm God's intentions for the genders in singleness, in dating, in marriage, and in parenthood. Along the way he liberally sprinkles references to Shakespeare (his personal favorite and a massive channel--according to Ensor--of God's common grace in the area of love and romance), South Pacific, Casablanca, Chaucer, and Johnny Cash. By blending Bible, practical insight, personal wisdom and experience, and secular material, Ensor has carved out a vibrant little space where honest examination of our deepest heart-issues takes place, unimpeded by prudishness or self-righteousness. The author's own flaws are in the spotlight along with various statistics and real-life examples that bring the material home, into our hearts. His method proves refreshing.

Section One (comprising four chapters) is a down-to-earth theology of gender. It sets the stage for the bulk of the book, Section Two. Section One then essentially covers the complementarity of man and woman, celebrating the God-given differences between genders. Secondly, it powerfully asserts that our basic need is for "a healthy tender, passionate, enduring, mutually satisfying relationship" with one partner of the opposite sex. Early on, Ensor deconstructs the postmodern view of sexual freedom, showing us just how bankrupt and undesirable is a series of arbitrary affairs.

The chapters in Section Two each highlight the complementary "actions" of the man and the woman. This section is largely practical and as such, offers a wealth of personal insight. It's warm insight, insight gained from experience, insight that has the stains of sweat and tears, insight that reminds us that we are all sinners saved by grace and in daily need of grace to overcome pride and selfishness in order to make our relationships (dating and espeically marital) sing. The theme of this section can be stated in this way: "God calls the man to love by sacrificing his immediate desires for those of her [i.e., his wife's] overall well-being and happiness. He calls the woman to submit her more immediate desires to his overall well-being and happiness. They are like two people running to get out of the rain and arriving together at the door. `You first.' `No, you first'" (132-33).

Section Two is so challenging, so convicting precisely because it's so practical. I was reminded in each chapter that the roles of man and wife are not only to be taken seriously but to be practiced comprehensively. A little passivity for the man, a little disengagement and indifference and passing the buck to the wife, leads to the wife's frustration, bitterness, and assumption of control. But when the man "lead[s] with questions rather than conclusions" (98), the wife will more naturally have no impulse to take over the leadership reins. She will teach him by example and "appeal to his thoughtfulness and ask for his consideration" (99). Ensor sounds the trumpet to all Christian men to lead with strength and sensitivity and to all women to submit with respectfulness and trust in the sovereignty of God to work out all the "kinks" in her man. What a sorely needed wake-up call to men who want to be boys and to women who want to be men!

Section Two gets stronger toward the end, each chapter building momentum on the previous one. The chapters on purity are necessarily frank. He writes, "Unmet sexual passion brings into focus a vision for being a husband and potentially a father" (121). And again he writes, "Covenanted intimacy unleashes passion with no admixture of shame and guilt" (122). What a fresh insight: "It [umnet sexual desire in the man] drives us to solve problems and get ready. It matures us" (121)! He calls women to wait, that in waiting women receive their reward of a mature, selfless, "ready" leader-partner who will marry her sooner rather than later and who will take the relationship where it needs to go according to the Bible. He writes on this subject, "Sisters, there is power in waiting. If you give away this God-endowed power and simply act...and satisfy his lusts, you undermine God's work of maturing manhood. So part company with the crowd. Become a noncomformist. Swim upstream...Purity is the litmus test. Waiting will reveal the heart of the matter" (106).

The balance in his approach makes this book essential reading for both sexes. The premium he places on practical male leadership and practical female submission reminds us that marriage is not playing at husband and wife; it's not a game with only temporary or hypothetical setbacks. Gender theology drives gender practice and so both make or break real marriages, real families. Even with the balanced approach, this book undoubtedly stresses male leadership in the marriage relationship and in the home. How could it not when the Bible does the same? Phrases like "heavier responsibility for the outcome" of family decisions and "to provide a vision for our children about God and his ways and purposes for them" (156) fall with a climactic thud on the shoulders of all men, particularly married men. It is a sound that resonates deep within men's hearts since God has placed such manly desires there. And, as the book constantly reminds us, if the Christian man would absorb the divinely loving blows of his biblical responsibilities, he will shape a God-centered, glory-giving, joy-filled, deeply satisfied family.

God has given us certain desires as men and women; they reside permanently within our hearts; they long to be fulfilled. As Christians, these desires are redeemed; they are now able to be fulfilled in a Christ-honoring way. What will we do with them? How will we invest our hearts in matters of romance and sex? Reading John Ensor's book is a handy investment guide--one necessary and relevant for a gender-beinding, sexually confused age.

I bought both How to love a Black man and How to love a Black woman. I gave the How to love a Black Woman to my partner while I started reading How to love a Black man. Both of us then exchanged what we had gotten from the books and had a deep conversation for hours on the issues brought up in the book. I learned about myself and about the pysche of a Black man. My girlfriends are waiting to read it with their mates!!

This is a book I definitely enjoyed. It's not some corny, step-by-step joint. Dr. Elmore did a great job of, for one, forcing the reader to look into the mirror at our own faults and insecurities. If one is able to do so and recognize they need work, then you should be able to read this with an open mind. Also, it should be much easier to take his words and advice and apply them to your situations. He is able to make something which we tend to complicate...extremely simple. There were plenty of times while I was reading when I saw something he said and knew I was guilty of this, or did that well, etc. He does a tremendous job of showcasing what we do in a positive light while also pointing out the various areas in which we need work and should pay closer attention. Plus, it shows how men can benefit from doing this, and the costs of doing that. There are times when you may read something and feel it's something you knew, but it helped me to know another person was thinking the same thing. It's pretty detailed in it's approach, but easy to take in. This is a book which should be read by every black man who has a genuine and sincere interest in building better and more loving relationships with Black women.

A great book for the brothers. Our reading circle debated it for hours. The next month we selected LaDawn Black's Stripped Bare for the ladies. These books are great companion pieces.

Having read "How To Love A Black Man", I had hoped that this book would be just as good, interesting and right on target. This book seems like it was rushed, not as much thought went into this book as the other book. Just to make sure, I had friends, both male and female, read both books. We all agreed that this book was not as well written as the other book. Seemed more like Dr. Elmore just said the opposite from the first book here without any real thought as to the woman's point of view.

This book is WONDERFUL! African men our different than any other man and our unique in their own right! Finally a book about us for our men... I also purchased his book about men for women.... I strongly urge anyone african person in a relationship to purchase the set and read them and then have a discussion with their mate

Dragged on and halfway through I couldn't finish it. This guy is the type of guy who thinks he is funnier than he actually is. Many other books out there that are similar and more entertaining. I think a lot of these 5-star reviews are contrived.

The dating game, a game that (almost) everyone plays at one time or another, is filled with its own dangers and pitfalls, all for the same reward. "God is a Woman" is a humorous dive into this world, offering insights and wisdom in response to the countless rhetorical questions that everyone asks. Filled with hilarious anecdotes, "God is a Woman" is a great gift for anyone hacking through the jungle that is being a bachelor or bachelorette. Highly recommended for community library humor collections.

This book is one of the best I've read on dating; I usually feel like I have to choose between advice that doesn't feel useful (from women) or advice that feels a little too manipulative and artificial (from PUAs). This book is the only one I've read so far that seems to strike the middle ground, giving good advice which I don't feel ashamed for having read. So, thanks, Ian.

When I heard this book was by a comedian I was expecting it to be hilarious since there is so much material that can be derived through dating, but it's not particularly funny. The dating advice this book has is decent, although pretty basic (which in my opinion is all that matters but it just isn't that interesting to read). The value this book had to me was that the stories are pretty interesting but they aren't going to shock you unless you and your friends were hermits in college and have never heard slutty stories or anything like that. There's a guy called Max Tucker who has some more outrageous stories which you can get online- just google him.

I only heard of this book because I listened to the author's review of The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed. I found his insights to be very good so I got his book. Of all these books Amazon pushes this one is by far the best. It is funny like being at a comedy show. It is full of great advice. No manipulatoin or deceit or bs. It will teach you not how to be a pua or playa but instead a bad boy, which is what women want most, or any type of guy you need to be as the circumstances warrant. (From his MM review: "Pua's use a woman's insecurities to make her feel bad about herself("negging"); bad boy's use a woman's insecurities to make her feel good about herself." He's not a jerk and yet still does really well. Funny, funny, funny!

This was one of the best books I've purchased. I caught myself picking apart the man in my life because I was scared of commitment, and this really helped me gain insight. I'm still a little overly-cautious, but much more aware of my motives and reasoning. I've passed this book along to my single girlfriend that always picks "unavailable" men, with hopes she may see her own apprehensions and ways to overcome them.

I loved this book and thought it would be a great gift for my girlfriends that want to start a light hearted book club!

As an older "singleton" who is now contemplating settling down with my serious other, I have been lately struck by intense anxiety and inability to make a decision about the future. I ran, not walked, to get this book when I heard about it. I found it very well-written and even ocassionally funny. It is really helpful to know that I am not alone in finding it hard to make a commitment, no matter how great my guy is and I thought the practical suggestions in the last chapter were very useful. I definitely recommend this book!

The information is very applicable to young people searching for answers regarding thier love life. I would recommend this book to many of my friends.

This is a great one Elina, it hit the nail on the head in many areas for me. Being able to put into words what I was feeling, I never thought that it was possible, I always thought it was the man who had committment phobia, who would've guessed it could be the woman. That was never discussed before Thanks a lot for your help!!!! Keep up the good work

I think many of a man would benefit tremendously from such a book, because it would help us figure out what's a better way to deal with a woman as a woman and not trying to deal with a woman as a man. Of course, it is hard to really distinguish males from females in terms of thinking. I think from what I read the extremely feminine woman that he describes who changes too much with the wind would not be my cup of tea. I've been with one like that, and things are too predictable. I prefer my woman to be more of a straight shooter. She can have her moods, be typical in many ways, but I think I prefer males or females I am dealing with to show consistency rather than simply changing based on feelings. I am a planner, and it is hard to plan if someone changes like the North Texas weather. Many women are not like that, but this is definitely a useful book for us males to respect women for how they and how they are different and to honor those differences while keeping our respect and sanity as males.

Break past the Ego. Learn the fundumentals to make you an attractive person. Happy filled with abbundance and alowing those that you want most to come to you, rather than chasing them.

This book and seminar lays out material on how to be the best man you can be. If this was required reading half of the failed relationships out there would either work themselves out or be cut off too early to be a problem. If men took the responsibility to understand themselves and how women view their actions we would all be much happier. Instead we can't understand our women and flounder until finally nobody is happy and we break up or divorce. David Deida lays out, in simple terms, how men can understand and even revel in the emotional storm that women are. This manual can not be recommended highly enough.

Ugh, what a load of bull. How do people keep making money off the tired old "men are *active*, women *receptive* stereotypes? People are people, and Deida is a jerk who sees women as subhuman.

I bought this for my boyfriend because the book completely transformed his life. He really loves the additional things Deida covers in the sessions, and he likes being able to listen to it while he's driving or working. He's made a lot of personal discoveries with it, and says that there is something different about hearing a human voice that drives some of the points home. Plus, Deida elaborates in the sessions, and can give it an even more personal touch.

My fiancee and I were planning an interfaith ceremony, and rather than find a rabbi or priest willing to marry us, we decided to have our non-denominationally ordained Aunt officiate. However, because she wasn't familiar with jewish traditions, we had to write our own ceremony - no easy task! But, this book simplifies the process by including many examples of interfaith marriage, and then a choice of readings and passages for each section of the wedding. My one concern would be that it only addresses interfaith marriages between jews and christians, but does not address interfaith ceremonies between jews, christians, hindus, buddhists, muslims, etc. However, that aside, I HIGHLY recommend this book if you are writing your own ceremony.

I am a Catholic woman marrying a Jewish man. We were very fortunate that my priest was supportive of our marriage and provided me with the standard Catholic booklet outlining the typical components of a Catholic wedding. But we were being married outside of the traditional mass and wanted to include my fiancé's Jewish heritage as well. The rabbi we were working with suggested this book. It is a great tool to help in the planning process. Rabbi Lerner provides an explanation of various traditions, gives a few sample outlines and then includes an appendix with various wording for each part of the ceremony. I could not have planned the Jewish half of our ceremony without this book!

This was a very helpful book with information about laws and culture that help make the ceremony inclusive and comfortable for families of different faiths. I highly recommend this book; I bought it for our children who will be getting married in the spring.

This book was great at providing structure and helping us understand our options when we wrote our own wedding ceremony (a Jew marrying a Catholic, with sensitivity to the pagans and atheists/agnostics attending). We lent our copy to two couples we know who got married after us (a nonpracticing Jew marrying a nonpracticing Christian; and a Jew marrying a Catholic/Quaker). I know that each of them has passed on the favor to at least one other couple, who also used it in their ceremonies. Anyone writing their own ceremony would get some value out of it, whether interfaith or not, though of course it is most specifically targeted to the Jewish/Christian union. We also supplemented with books specific to each of the religions we wanted to include, but I found this this book to be the best "how-to" of them all.

I was asked to officiate for my brother (who grew up Jewish) and his fiance (who grew up Protestant), as neither of them are religious, but wanted to have a wedding that both families would feel comfortable with. After getting ordained online, I had a huge challenge ahead of me - how to do something beautiful, personal, and would make everyone happy. Well, this book did it for me! It's about 1/3 explanations on wedding ceremonies and things to be aware of that could be sensitive to either side, 1/3 sample ceremonies, and 1/3 a whole bunch of suggested pieces/readings/explanations under each ceremony component - 7 ideas you could use here, 4 ideas here... It made creating their ceremony a breeze, eliminating many of the expected arguments/discussions, and led to a beautiful ceremony. Thanks Rabbi Lerner!!!