Sex Relationships Books

A must read for all young couples going through difficult times. This book saved my relationship and my family. My boyfriend (now husband) and I found ourselves expecting a baby when we were both far too young. We knew several other couples in the same situation at that time. All of them ended up giving up on their relationships within the first year (or before) of their babies lives. I wish they could have read this book. It gave me the strength to tough it out through the hardest days. I am so glad that I did, too (12 plus years now)!

When conflicts arise in a marriage, the promise of peace through divorce is a temptation that few can resist. Divorce has become an acceptable and frequently encouraged solution to marital problems. As the Prathers tell us, today's "separation psychology," with its myriad of support groups and counselors, promotes selfishness: "you have a right to the kind of life you want," "the right partner will share your interests, meet your needs, and grow at the same rate you grow," "what's best for you is best for the children." Then we have the lure of certain "new age" ideas, such as the concept of soul mates, which excuses us from fulfilling our commitment to our original "imperfect" partner while we search for our "perfect counterpart."
The Prathers contend that none of us "deserves" an "ideal primary relationship and the fulfillment of all our dreams. What we deserve is love, and we have it only when we give it." For more than 20 years, Hugh and Gayle Prather have counseled couples and encouraged them to give to one another, thus building permanent, satisfying, and spiritually based relationships - the kind that can "go through fire."
The Prathers found that couples who divorces in spite of counseling are rarely happier after separation, and the betrayal of abandonment is damaging to their children and the community, as well as to the soul of the betrayer. The Prathers see the rash of divorces in today's society as one of the symptoms of an epidemic of fear and hatred. Their hope is that I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU will serve as an emergency manual to deal with tis ongoing disaster.
Filled with wit and wisdom, this manual takes us through all the stages a couple typically experiences in a long-term relationship. It clearly outlines the exercises and sensitizing techniques that the Prathers and their clients have used to successfully heal the breaches in their faltering unions.
The Prathers hold up the real relationship as the ideal for all couples to strive toward. Their definition of a "real" relationship is "one in which two people love each other to fulfill themselves rather than withdraw from each other to fulfill themselves." It is "unquestionably a haven from fear... Once it becomes the goal of any two people, it not only lasts but grows stronger and lovelier with every effort." Any couple who sets this kind of relationship as a goal will find that the Prathers' book will serve as a guide through the storms of life until the two can say to each other: "I love you; I bless you; I want to walk home to God with you."

Emily VanLaeys, author of DREAM WEAVING: USING DREAM GUIDANCE TO CREATE LIFE'S TAPESTRY

My husband and I have been married 17 years this spring. Twelve years ago we went through a major marriage crisis, and I credit Hugh Prather with giving us the tools to not only survive, but thrive. We now have two beautiful children, work together as partners in the same business and love and respect each other more than ever. Whether you are already in a relationship or yearning to be in one - READ THIS BOOK. It is life changing.

This is without question the best book on relationships I've ever read. I am a huge fan of the Prathers, and this book is one of their best. It has saved my marriage on more than one occasion, and I have given it as a gift to many friends embarking on new relationships, marriages or at a difficult stage in the one they're in. The bottom line message is about treating one's partner with gentleness, and being their best friend in the world. This involves a good deal of soul searching, forgiveness, honesty and dialogue - but more than anything it's a mindset, a willingness to love unconditionally. It's BIG stuff, and not for the faint-hearted or those who prefer to be right than happy. If what you're after is the ever-deepening joy of a long-term commitment, this is the book for you.

I picked up this book at the recommendation of a friend right after my wife left. I gave her the book to try to work things out, and I feel if she would have just read it, things could have been different; it's that powerful. The points presented seem so easy, and so simple to implement, but most of us just do not for whatever reason.

I highly recommend this book to anyone in relationship crisis, as well as anyone attemping to avoid relationship issues in the future.

This book disputes the assertion that marriage is only meant to be between a man and a woman. Originally, heterosexual marriage was mostly arranged by families for money and power and it was same-sex marriage (sanctioned by the church) that was considered for the true love of the other person. Ancient texts of same-sex unions are included and are a great addition to any modern ceremony!

In reviewing other reviews of this book, it's apparent that those approving of it / objecting to it are mostly people who approve of / object to same-sex marriage. Which tells us little about the book's veracity or validity.

There are no truly neutral observers, simply variations in the degree to which one is prejudiced toward or against a particular position. This book is so heavily footnoted and appendixed, and Boswell seems to be at such pains to clarify exactly what he is and is not claiming, and why, that it is hard to believe he is not being intellectually honest, despite the fact he had a vested interest in promoting same-sex marriage. In short, Boswell gives at least the illusion of objectivity. This is enhanced by the fact that he builds his argument over many chapters, showing the social context into which church-authorized same-sex unions fit, rather than presenting documentation on just the unions -- a point which most of his detractors conveniently overlook.

The bias -- and carelessnes -- of some reviewers is blatant. Kevin Davis states "...Boswell argues that rituals for the binding of two males (in Eastern Christendom) between the 12th and 16th centuries is evidence of the support for same-sex marriages in earlier Christianity. This is yet another example of a scholar misinterpreting historical facts in order to serve an agenda."

Anyone who paid attention knows that the preceding statement is mostly untrue. (For example, the rituals existed for over 1000 years, and were in use in other parts of Cristendom.) Boswell explicitly states, over and over again, that these same-sex unions were not, as far as the ceremony itself went, marriage ceremonies (which is why the book has the title it does), and he repeatedly shows how they differ (though the difference is not huge). He does, however, draw a distinction between what is written in a ceremony, and how people perceive the ceremony, suggesting that "the populace" viewed the union as a marriage (though not necessarily with a sexual element).

"matt" states "I would suggest that we all need to be careful in reading into texts and history what would make us feel better about ourselves." Agreed. But what about reading text and history based on what we currently perceive as true or false, right or wrong? matt conveniently forgets that "the church" systematically persecuted homosexual men and women for a thousand years -- and he's surprised when some of them are happy to find a bit of history that indicates the church at one time supported (if probably only unintentionally) their affectional preferences?

Which brings us to the issue of the essentialist / constructivist argument. Throughout the book, Boswell (it seems to me) leans in the constructivist direction, by attempting to interpret everything in the context of how the people of the time would have seen or valued it. This is far from trying to force a "modern" homo / hetero perspective on the analysis, which many critics seem to accuse Boswell of doing. (They, of course, do the same thing, but from "the other side".)

Those disagreeing with Boswell do so primarily by grossly misreading him, by taking his arguments out of context, or out of simple prejudice. They don't want to believe his interpretation might be correct.

There is another set of "facts" not discussed (or even mentioned) in this book. One is that homosexual practice between consenting adult males (I'm deliberately omitting paederasty, the love of young men, violation of slaves & prisoners, etc) is not unheard-of historically (qv, the pagan Celts). A berdache was often married to a man of the tribe (see Ruth Benedict), who presumably enjoyed sodomizing another man.

I do not believe people stir up a hornet's nest that refuses to quiet down by means of bad scholarship or specious reasoning. Boswell does not seem to be indulging in either.

As (the non-gay) friendly Professor Peter Schickele likes to say... "Truth is truth. You can't have opinions about truth." Boswell's interpretation of the historical evidence is almost certainly correct.

This book illustrates the importance of proper words for the proper functioning of society. It also brings to mind the raging modern debate about the word "marriage:" Those who want to define it to also mean the sanction of homosexual unions and those who oppose that particular use of the word.
Past linguistic history suggests a possible end to this debate (presently in an impasse) by creating a neologism for same-sex unions. I propose, for whatever it is worth, the word "parriage." It is remarkably close to "marriage" and it strongly suggests pairing. It may well satisfy those who seek social change without antagonizing the feelings of those who want to continue to use the word "marriage" in its traditional sense. After all, while the past has certainly a claim on the present and even the future, it cannot prevent social progress.

Messrs.: Some reviewers' titles, when combined with their texts, are remarkably suggestive of Freudian slips with regard to what is seemingly in their respective minds, and reveal where their thoughts and inhibitions lie. Part of this is exposed by an attendant desire to promote whatever they define as a sort of self-supposed or imagined world standard for an amorphous mythical "tradition," which is to be supposedly found by all a higher authority to the numerous and irrefutable historical facts presented by Boswell. First of all, to-day's concept of Romantic Love was simply unrefined before three hundred or so years ago, and the evolving nature of various associated rituals come down to us from that point. Second, before that evolution (or devolution, depending on your perspective), the so-called traditions of friendship, brotherhood (and all related terms and practices), abduction, and marriage as then and also formally practiced, I would emphasize, together with the near universal association of the masculine or masculinity with male same-sex personages (most often heroes, gods and demi-gods), practices, acts and interests, were all firmly homosexual. Practitioners were unabashedly presentated worldwide as homosexual to a predominant audience for many tens of centuries. Third, homosexual relationships and not heterosexual ones were considered the more natural, ascendant, as well as the norm, and certainly the position actively and overtly promoted by the early and later Church. Most churchmen (and members of their flock), of yester-day and to-day, were exceedingly avid practitioners of homosexual desire, love and friendships. Read for yourself what they reduced to writing, in whatever language you read, for proofs. Why then the anguished surprise, unfounded denials and the sense of disgust, for lack of other expressions, publicly expressed concerning the long, historical, widely known, and accepted practice of marriage between same-sex partners, either as performed and thus sanctified by the Church or via the equally acceptable alternative vehicle, which also bestowed the appellation of marriage on the same-sex relationship, of simply living together as a couple and being recognized as married by your neighbors? This is what Boswell has written in both of his monumental works, as I comprehend him. Some have missed these essentials altogether. This reality, as conveyed and constructed of fact after fact by Boswell, is the complete obverse, quite obviously, of what many uninformed or head-in-the-sand people believe, or are determined to believe, as traditional because of what they have been taught erroneously or might prefer to think for various reasons. But Boswell's revelations and relentless enumeration of historical facts and their elucidation is nonetheless well researched and undeniably true, and his work stands appropriately at the polar opposite to the watered-down and factually ignorant fabrications written by others, which non-facts and mis-apprehensions are further carelessly bandied about by the majority of heterosexualists (or non-Uranians), whether due to willful ignorance, nervous denial, or homophobic hysteria. To compound this egregious situation, during the mid-Nineteenth Century, as Boswell also informs the reader, we began to define individuals in terms of which of two genders they loved, which is itself an absurd shrinking of the spectrum of human practice, something not previously thought remotely to be necessary, or yet considered and conceptualized before then. Homosexualists were first categorized as Uranians until the term homosexual became the standard adjective (it is not properly used as a noun), although the word Gay had been used previously for centuries, for those having similar natural interests. Do not confuse the heterosexual family unit of to-day with the preferred arrangement from antiquity to present because indeed it was not the relational preference until quite recently along the timeline. As well, heterosexual marriage, when and if selected, was almost always performed for dynastic reasons (usually under terms of a contract), but not for love as is asserted to be the cause to-day. There was also a real need to address familial concerns related to procreation and rights of inheritance, which actively drove the contractual parties (the parents or guardians) to ensure that the husband would be the most likely father of any resultant progeny. These particulars are clearly demonstrated by what Boswell (and other historians and intellectuals of current and past note) presents again and again in his book(s). To the ancients and those living up to the Modern Era's fringe, the female was a drone and a minor property item, and mostly recognized as an object of procreative necessity-this is a fact, not a statement of belief or errant misogyny--although not the object of true friendship or love (i.e., intelligent love or bond), and certainly not an equal partner in marriage as our common but incorrect heterosexual currency would now define it. If you should care to read the ancient wits, various Greek and Roman philosophers and like playwrights, up to the beginnings of the Romantic Era, their most acidic and vituperative comments and biting satires would focus upon the cuckold who actually professed to love his mate (notice I do not here use the terms spouse or wife because, once more, as shown by Boswell, there were no official ceremonies, whether secular or religious, then extant, until the Late Middle Ages, which is why most relationships of whatever type were what we to-day define as common law). Since females were universally thought not to possess the intellectual equipment, loyalty or logic requisite for true love or even friendship (the term "friends," when used to described a relationship amongst males, was then more freighted with serious meaning than to-day), and possessed of no capability to form a lasting relationship, they were employed in drudgery, for ready sexual satisfaction, child-bearing and rearing, and housekeeping duties. In the centuries before condoms and the pill, as Boswell relates, young men were more frequently employed for the sexual release of older males (unwanted children were very frequently abandoned or sold), especially when all members of a household were under the sway of the pater familias or dominant male, and where all members were dominated and considered equal prey. In addition, Boswell writes, homosexual love was considered greatly preferable to heterosexual love in all respects, as well as being far more natural, tasteful and enduring. Indeed, most ancient males held the opinion that heterosexual sex was highly disgusting and distasteful, and could cause one to become effeminate, if performed too regularly. At present, due largely to the misanthropy of the so-called feminist revolution and its resultant devolution, already infected and informed by the limpid ideals of Romantic Love that preceded it, true historical tradition with regard to one's affective interests, love and relationships has been literally turned upside down. Neither the ancients, members of the so-called Church, both early and late, nor the Renaissance Man or the scholars of the Enlightenment would recognize or yet understand this massive turn of events in affective interest. Given only one of the many well-documented examples provided by Boswell, it could be easily established that, following the historical precursors of same-sex abduction and adoption, marriage was first practiced amongst those with same-sex affective interests. These facts are directly converse to the inaccurate and deceiving portrayal concocted by to-day's (and yester-day's) ignorant rabble that marriage is of heterosexual origin and that heterosexual relationships have been the exclusive preference of all mankind since time out of mind, regardless of such assertions being proven non-historical and without basis in fact or reality. As with one reviewer here, who wrote when addressing Same-Sex Unions..., "the parallels to marriage are utterly unquestionable," but then backs away and asserts that he "doubt(s) that he (Boswell) establishes that same-sex marriage existed," there is a consistently disappointing and confused attempt to somehow create a distinction without a real difference. That is timidity, intellectual atrophy and denial taken to extremes, which is, sadly, just one example of what can be described as intellectual suicide and the stubborn avoidance of reality whenever and wherever this particular subject matter is broached. I think the singularly tremendous and beneficial scholarship of Boswell and what will be his distinguished legacy require all honest readers, together with his book reviewers, to consider the known (even if uncomfortable) and unavoidable facts, and to not bring their biases, sense of denial, misunderstandings (purposeful or otherwise) and timorousness to bear on this great work of history, or to this subject matter as a whole.

Potential Reader: If you are interested in historical realities, fact and not bias, truth, and same-sex studies, then you need to read everything that John Boswell has written in this regard. Here, Boswell peels layer after layer of obscuring biases, prejudices, and untoward mis-apprehension from this long buried subject matter, thereby allowing us to view it clearly without the purposefully applied and clouding gloss from centuries of overt, outright lies about the character, naturalness, myths and legends, and the true history and works of an entire group of always existing human beings, who differ from their fellows only in terms of affective interest. Boswell's book does not promulgate an "agenda," whether perceived curiously as hidden or open, as asserted by and irrespective of the dishonest pretenses of its somehow blissful detractors. Rather, this is a very prescient, professionally competent and scholarly presentation of historical fact. It is tremendously unfortunate that some have chosen the disappointing path of continued denial and purposeful, wanton ignorance, yet even long after its publication. And like all and any other works of the professional historian, portions of such are open to learned, dispassionate debate, but should not be the subject of stubbornly ignorant and myopic diatribes of the most wrong-headed and biased sort, especially when coupled with no factual bases to somehow buttress their failed argument on behalf of the contrary opinion. Some of the reviewers here must be addressing instead some work other than that of Boswell, since what they assert has nothing whatever to do with either the extraordinary breadth and depth of this present work nor with its several and brilliantly interwoven theses. For example, one reviewer's reiteration of a Greek term uncomfortably provides the sense of homophobic panic, and this then is compounded by a wondrously absurd attempt to use a preposterous and nonexistent conflict in interpretation to deconstruct Boswell's entire work, on the simpleminded basis of that reviewer's peculiar use and his uniquely perceived meaning of one word in Greek. The Greek word as suggested does not, obviously was not intended to, and simply could not conceivably bear the entire weight, thematically or otherwise, of Boswell's much broader conception for his quite extensive work, which is the subject of my review. Boswell was wholly conversant, as this book more than clearly demonstrates, in several ancient and modern languages and was also a greatly respected and internationally recognized scholar of renown (a full professor at Yale University) in his own right. I would conjecture that this book's naysayers' supposed credentials or degrees were mail-ordered from some evangelical bible college. As for the unschooled, silly, but too conveniently oft-parroted misconception that asserts as some kind of unassailable fact the totally fanciful, nonhistorical idea of "male friends as only just friends" in ancient through pre-modern times, if one had bothered to read the book past the first fifty pages or so, it would have been learned and such provided with a number of verifiable examples that would inform even the most closed of minds that the concept of male "friends" and "friendship" had a much more significant, certainly romantic, and very serious meaning to males who lived during those historical periods. For some, these attitudes are operative, valid and present to-day. Reviewers also missed large sections of this work that addressed same-sex union ceremonies and, more importantly, those paragraphs abundantly devoted to the clear contemporary meaning of these unions to the actual participants and to their contemporaries. I myself am a Near and Middle Eastern History scholar, and I can attest to Professor Boswell's professional accuracy and correctness with regard to his translations, as well as to his use of the sources and materials he had to hand, and also to the substantiveness of the undoubted in-depth peer reviews that preceded and substantiated each and every part of this book. Boswell's scholarly appreciation for and his very selection and use of the many resources and source materials cited and compiled here, some quite arcane and largely unknown or even those illicitly altered and redacted centuries ago, are a virtual treasure trove of hidden, ignored and bypassed knowledge, even if some of it is general, that we are at long last made aware, having been brought from forgotten depths in to the light to inform. All is presented and conveyed in a style that is as interesting and informative to read as a good novel, or perhaps, for example, the excellent social histories by Barbara Tuchman. Yet 'Same-Sex Union...' is both a serious book for the historian (and even more so for the public at large, if they only will take the opportunity to learn) and moreover an exceedingly necessary work that I, for one, am very pleased was written, especially so by a person with the outstanding credentials Boswell possessed. I am very proud to have this book resident in my bookshelf, it having been read and referenced many times since being acquired. The information concerning Nero and Hadrian and their respective lovers and husbands (Sporus and Antinous), as well as the many so-called paired saints (Serge and Bacchus, etc.), together with the internal mini-histories and fascinating cultural aspects of abduction, adoption and marriage (greatly differing from the practices and rationales employed in our presumably modern society) in the ancient and premodern worlds was, for me, the most intriguing, informative and fascinating. His extra-textual cites, definitions, explications, notes, and appendices are utterly superb, and could not be bettered or more revealing. Surely, it was (and is again) time that someone with the requisite credentials, background, intellect and scholarship, moxie, rectitude, and writing skills, like Boswell, wrote this sort of history (I would definitely say the same for his previous much needed and heralded work: 'Christianity, Social...'). This book is a very densely-packed, highly intellectual and appropriately technical work, so if you like your histories 'light,' I would strongly recommend a sort of 'warm-up' first with other works of like but less intensive nature before tackling it without some preparatory information and knowledge. In my opinion, you, the fortunate reader of this book, will actually derive more from Boswell's work should you be prepared to comprehendingly read and thoroughly understand it--rather than try to get by with only the application of, at best, a pedestrian, provincial background and with a near dearth of requisite knowledge, such as that so embarrassingly exposed and natteringly evinced by some few intellectually challenged and clearly prejudiced exemplars displayed and revealed in a number of preceding reviews. I only wish that I could give this monumentally excellent work by Boswell more than 5-stars!

For those who are simply interested in "new positions" and don't care about the spiritual aspects of Tantra, I would suggest Tracey Cox's _Kama Sutra_. _The Bedside Kama Sutra_ is a step up in addressing the spiritual side of sex.

Throughout you will find many suggestions of doing yoga in order to really delve into what Tantra has to offer. This, I believe, is because of two reasons: first, because yoga will provide the strength and flexibility needed to even do some of the more acrobatic positions. Second, because doing yoga genuinely will allow you to become more present with your body and be more open to the body of your partner. A few of the positions are (put too simply) position, insert, and simply enjoy each other's presence without thrusting or orgasm (with suggestions to gently caress each other and enjoy the simpler aspects of sexual intimacy). As one other reviewer stated: this is hard work. It really is hard to work to be with the one you love, to be in the throes of desire, and to sit and rejoice in their simply being there.

In short: this book isn't just about how to get mind-blowing orgasms (though really working on Tantra can help with that), but about how to be present with your lover (with orgasm being one aspect of that closeness) and should be practiced in tandem with yoga and meditation (if they can be separated; many modern approaches to yoga often thinks they are separable, though more traditional approaches don't). My biggest criticism of this book is that this connection is still not explicit enough, though hinted at enough that the perceptive reader will notice it. If you are not willing to do the latter, then this book might not be what you're looking for.

This book is full of good photography, clear explanations, interesting historical trivia, and a good dose of humor. I can't wait to give it to my girlfriend for Valentine's Day and start trying to pull off some of these! ;)

I was quite impressed with this book. It gives step-by-step, illustrated instructions for getting into each position. The pictures are tasteful, and the models attractive.

IT CONTAINS BAD PICTURES AND NONSENSE. THIS BOOK DIDN`T FULFILL MY EXPECTATIONS. I HIGHLY RECOMMEND TO TRY ANOTHER BOOK.

What expectations does the Kama Sutra hold for you? Myself, I had little expectations when I bought this book but I am pleasantly surprised by what I've taken away from my reading of The Bedside Kama Sutra.
The book illustrates 23 positions for pleasure and passion but you don't have to do all twenty-three to feel like you got your moneys worth.

First things first, this book is not an exercise guide to sex. If you buy this book to execute every move to a perfect climax you'll more than likely be disappointed. Beautifully illustrated this guide is a wonderful addition to any sexual/erotic personal library. Holistic in approach to the very intimate connection between two people this guide offers a unique incorporation of the senses of sight, sound, touch, taste, and smell to help you create sensuality and to enhance your sexual experience.

Of course the positions are the main event but they are preluded by a section called "centre yourself" that helps you explore all your senses to maximize your personal experience. Once you've recharged or reclaimed your senses with the first section you can take a good look at each position in the book.

Each position is featured over multiple pages with step by step text to help you perform the position and multiple photographs illustrating the progressive movement with in the position. Also, there is written commentary to help you understand the position and aid to your understanding of what to expect from the position. Through out the book are translated text from the original Kama Sutra that gives you some insight into this ancient highly sexualized Indian culture. Many of the translated text cover topics that are controversial even today.

Personally, I enjoyed this book but I didn't use this book as your traditional sexual guide. I read the book and assessed my own ability and the ability of my partner. Once I did that I incorporated specific aspects from some of the positions that interested me. I'm not sure any one couple can perform every position with in this book. You must take into consideration your own physical ability along with your partners' ability and realize that many of the positions in this book require a great deal of strength and flexibility by both the man and woman.

One of the many reasons to purchase The Bedside Kama Sutra is the wonderful imagery created by the photographer, the two featured attractive models, and the sensual subject depicted with dignified class.

girldiver:)

If you are looking to "date out of your league" don't but this book. If you are looking for "tips" such as, bathe before you leave the house, don't talk about your x, don't talk on the cell, hold open the door or pull out chair, you know, the basics, then the book is perfect for you.

Not sure, however, if the book delivers on its title. There are many helpful hints to increase your odds of dating (grooming, approach, etc.) Nothing specific to dating "out of your league." If you want general information about what females find attractive, here is your book.

This book nails it when it comes to addressing dating issues with men. The author seems to really know the species. She gets to the point with humor, acknowledgement and a pure understanding of what men are looking for and how they can get it without losing the proverbial "man card."

Date Out of Your League is a "how to" guide for the average guy. Masini intuitively leaves out the fluff and lists the important stuff about dating and relationships. Her skillfull style brings forth, not only a design for dating, but a blueprint for living in relationships that promises not to torture men with too much introspection and diva-driven dissection.

When I read it, I could easily picture a guy flopping down on the couch, scanning the pages and being comfortable in them. I felt confident that once he got started he wouldn't be able to put it down and the light bulb would go on, giving him the easy wherewithall to finish--the book and the process of finding a satisfying relationship.

A lot of people think that if they read a book, then they will know how to seduce any woman. The truth is, that it's not going to happen like that. These books on picking up women have some interesting concepts, and they do offer some good advice, but the reader needs to be aware that these books written by PUAs are simply a sales pitch to a $1250 seminar, that is a sales pitch to a $4500 seminar, and that leads to personal tutoring, and Thousands of more dollars. I have know two people who have gotten duped by this. And these two guys are getting laid less than when they first getting into this and just trying and failing.

I would highly recommend three books that will give you all the information you need to speak to a woman and carry yourself in a way that might attract her.

1) Art of Seduction by Robert Greene: A historical account of some of the great seducers, and what made them effective.

2) Irresistible Attraction: by Kevin Hogan and Mary Lee Labay: This book scientifically evaluates what Charisma is and how to develop it.

3) God is a woman: by Ian Coburn: (My Favorite) This book is very well written by a man who evaluates the train-wrecks he had dating, then dissects what went wrong and how he improved on the next woman. He actually walks the reader through every step and teaches as he entertains.

*** And by the way: None of the above three books is a sales pitch for a useless seminar.

I was 58 when I read this, so it didn't do me much good, what with my having already discovered by trial and error most of what the author has to say; but oh the agony I could have been spared if I'd had a book like this when I was 18. I copy of this book should be given to every boy at his high-school graduation, as he's preparing to enter the brutal world of adult dating.

Masini has been critized for not talking about the importance of a man's developing "content" and "depth." She doesn't, but doing so would be a waste of time. A man either has depth or he doesn't. Give a jerk a lecture on depth and all you'll have is a jerk who knows how to fake being deep.

Honestly I was expecting a few more pointers and tips and less of a lecture. What I read was good, I just wanted more.

I would recommend 500 Lovemaking Tip by Michael Webb which gave a lot of fun techniques and interesting things you can do to spice things up.

okay maybe that is a little harsh, but i was not inspired to read this book. i thik the best part about it was the advise on doing pelvic floor exercises.

How to Be a Great Lover: Girlfriend-to-Girlfriend Time-Tested Techniques That Will Blow His Mind
is a MUCH better book infact it's great.

I found this a very enlightening book. I love romance, but never thought to romance my husband. I now think of ideas of what I would want in romance, and do these for him. It is fun, and the book really helps.

I recently saw this book, and jokingly suggested that my wife read it. She said she'd read it if I read it first. Now that sounded like a challenge I couldn't refuse!

This is a slim book, and with its easy to read casual style, it was a very quick read. I'm not sure exactly what I was expecting in this book, but what I found was very educational and informative. This book provides a great deal of very practical advice for women who want to improve the quality of their love lives. While some of the specific suggestions in this book wouldn't necessarily apply to me, the general approach was definitely something I would appreciate. Any woman looking to improve her relationship with her husband, boyfriend or lover would find this easy to read book and its practical advice helpful. I'm definitely going to be sure my wife reads it!

Let's face it, girls - certain things are all about technique. This book can teach you to improve your technique at things that even your lover didn't know could be improved!

It's a fast and easy read - so if it can improve anything even a little bit - why not take an hour and read it?

This book is, indeed, a must-have!

According to the author, who is gay, he writes for straights in his column of which this book is a compilation. Personally, I didn't find it all that enlightening. Maybe he just picks the letters to which he can give a humorous response and the purpose of his columns isn't actually to instruct. The answers to his readers' questions were often flippant and dismissive. However, I did enjoy Dan Savage's other book "The Kid". If you're looking for humor of a sort, you might enjoy this book. If you're looking for answers about sex - keep looking.

I knew going in, that reading Savage Love was going to be fun and it was. But since this collection of advice columns was the actual advice, from time to time, because I could relate to what was being asked, the advice was helpful.

Dan Savage might hate to hear this, but he has a fairly conventional morality. Yes, that gay advocate of sexual pleasure, known from time to time to advocate infidelity, actually comes across as a person who, through hearing the whinings and self-deception of thousands of letter writers, has come to some general conclusions like: honesty is really a good idea in the long run, consideration will usually rebound in your favor, etc.

No, nobody is going to read this book to hear from someone with a neoconservative ethics. You're going to read it to get some pointers on oral or anal sex, or for the laughs, or to learn about the best sex tip: talking to your partner about what you want.

Yep, he's harsh sometimes and not that big on empathy - but it isn't worth the trouble to empathize with everyone. And he gives good advice. Mostly though, empathy isn't all that funny, and he's the funniest advice columnist I've ever read, and he does it without giving bad advice. Word.

Dan Savage might hate to hear this, but he has a fairly conventional morality. Yes, that gay advocate of sexual pleasure, known from time to time to advocate infidelity, actually comes across as a person who, through hearing the whinings and self-deception of thousands of letter writers, has come to some general conclusions like: honesty is really a good idea in the long run, consideration will usually rebound in your favor, etc.

No, nobody is going to read this book to hear from someone with a neoconservative ethics. You're going to read it to get some pointers on oral or anal sex, or for the laughs, or to learn about the best sex tip: talking to your partner about what you want.

Investigating and trying to understand the dark world of internet infidelity this book has been a real eye-opener. It has helped me understand that the parties taking part all justify and rationalize their activities the same way while allowing me to feel that my feelings are the same as most injured parties. It is disturbing but helpful on the road back to getting a damaged relationship back on track.

The language of this book is very simple, easy to follow and to understand. Infidelity online is a very recent subject, so it's difficult to find serious books about it. I'm studing this topic in my post-graduation course, and this book has helped me a lot. I think that infideliy online need to be more searched until now!

I came online to buy this book, now that I've read it. I got it originally to see what it might have, information wise, since my ex-husband and I discussed the chat rooms and cyber situations in the past. I never thought of myself as cheating, since I kept it open to him, but it led that direction anyway, and I really wish that I'd had this book a couple years back.

This book defines and tries to explain internet infidelity. It shows the hurtful and destructive effects of internet infidelity on all parties concerned, often using case histories to illustrate types of behavior and the potential effects.

This book became a "reality checkpoint" for me when I needed it most. My husband kept telling me that there's nothing wrong with chat room encounters because they "aren't real" (whatever that means), that chat room encounters are no worse than looking at a pornographic magazine, and that, in any event, it's all my fault. For a while, I was plagued with grief, guilt and self-doubt. This book helped me see the excuses, denials and finger-pointing for what they really were. If you are having self-doubts and are beating yourself up emotionally, take a look at this book.

This book helped my husband realize and acknowledge his addiction, and helped me, his wife, to understand what exactly he was dealing with. It also helped us both begin his recovery by suggesting ways to overcome and deal with this kind of addiction. I DEFINITELY give this book a 5* rating, simply because it saved my marriage.

In 8 chapters, Machele Kindle, otherwise known as Master Fire, lays out her reasoning and purpose behind her own M/s household's structure. Her approach is purposeful, meant to help her readers consider what they want and how to get it while being grounded in reality. Each section includes three parts: first her reasoning behind each set of expectations, second a set of questions for both wouldbe masters and wouldbe slaves to consider, and finally a copy of the relevant section of her own manual. A good look into one master's mind that does not fall into the common trap of thinking hers is the only way a relationship should function

Overall it was decently written and covers a lot of ground. Worth a look if you've never created a manual.

This is a very important book in the literature about Master/slave relations and, in particular, about Master/slave Households. This book is both very narrow and very broad. It is narrow because it remains true to discussing the often-complex workings of a Leather Household. It is broad in that it succeeds extremely well in covering the intricacies and give and take of such a Household.

For those of you interested in the Leather Master/slave life, it's a "must read."

This book starts with lot of myths related to entitlement,autonomy,romantic love,gender myths,marriage. Recognizing some amount of narcissim in all relationships, does not make it seem so very pathological...

A defining dimension of pathological narcissism is the inability to foster and maintain intimacy. Intimacy is not only feared - it is despised because it is perceived as 'common' and 'degrading'. The narcissist idealizes his sources of narcissistic supply and then habitually discards and devalues them. This book is instrumental both as a somewhat iconoclastic introduction to narcissism and as an anatomy of the frustration that is life with a narcissist. Sam Vaknin, author of "Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited".

I read any book about narcissism eagerly, but this one disappointed me. The title "Narcissism and Intimacy" implied to me that this book would explain the frustrating and psychologically devastating maze that is life with a pathological narcissist. It didn't. Maybe because it is a book more about therapy than real life experiences, I found it murky and did not teach me anything new about the subject. Usually I find it heartening to read accounts of the impact of the narcissist on the lives of their significant others, but I really got nothing out of this book. I also got the idea the author was discussing regular narcissism, a personality trait, as opposed to pathological narcissism, a personality disorder. If you want to read a great book that will explain everything you want to know about pathological narcissism, read Sam Vaknin's book "Malignant Self Love", which is long and a little expensive, but really the ultimate book on the subject and worth every penny. If you want something shorter and less expensive, try "When Your Perfect Partner Goes Perfectly Wrong" by Mary Jo Fay.

I feel that this book will help both men and women understand not only themselves but their spouse better. All of us have varying degrees of narcissism and in order to love someone we need to learn to control our own needs for the betterment of the two as one and the one we love. This book helps with giving one a better understanding of how we can do that and what may be holding us back from really experiencing true love and intimacy.

This book is more of a therapist's guide to dealing with a few particular narcisstic marriages. The only thing this book does is to discuss certain narcisstic personalities in a marriage situation. That's about as far as the author takes the topic. Narcissism is only talked about in a marriage setting, not in terms of any love or relationships outside of a marriage. While the author does give some interesting examples and does well comparing and contrasting narcisstic and non-narcisstic personalities, the examples are few and are very particular to certain types of marriges and are hard apply to anything else. The author also doesn't give any clues on how to go about changing narcisstic patterns if you're stuck in them, which is what I was hoping to find when I bought the book.

WHAT SMART COUPLES KNOW: THE SECRET TO A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP tells how to use emotional intelligence to guarantee success in relationships. The ability to understand and transmit emotions is key to a successful relationship, and the author's nearly-30 years of clinical work with such couples lends to a program to help develop skills to turn individuals into satisfying partners. An interactive style offers up specific techniques and exercises for personal development.

Diane C. Donovan
California Bookwatch

This book is valuable for not only improving relationships with partners, but also for improving relationships in many other areas of life.
The author writes with a common sense and down-to-earth approach. The first part of the book gives information necessary for good relationships and the second part of the book shows how to achieve results. There are many examples and exercises which will help the reader develop emotional intelligence which is the cornerstone of this book.
This is not the "run of the mill" self-help book. It is a book that you will reference again and again if you are really serious about creating and maintaining good relationships.

I found this book and the idea of emotional intelligence to be an eye opening stepping stone. It brought to my attention possible reasons behind my relationship issues and behaviors. The real life examples used throughout the book simplify feelings and behaviors that can seem so complicating when viewing yourself from within. I would recommend "What Smart Couples Know..." to anyone that wants to be a better partner, parent, family member, or co-worker.

I am a psychologist and have read many books directed at couples, but I found this one to be one of the best. I appreciated its broad scope in psychology that brings into consideration aspects of being human that are integral to relationships. At the same time, the many practical exercises are excellent in helping focus on where we need to grow to have successful relationiships in our lives--as well as increased happiness. I am skeptical of the notion of emotional intelligence, but I think what the author lays out in a very readable and entertaining format is a path to emotional maturity in its many aspects. I recommend this book wholeheartedly. It is a great piece of work.

If you have ever struggled in a relationship or want to know how help yourself become a better partner in a relationship, this is a terrific book. I'm divorced and have just recently started dating. I read Dr. Covalt's book to gain better insight into how my behavior detracts/improves a relationship. There are multiple quizes to give insight into current behavior and information on how to become a better relationship partner. It's very well written in a clear manner without the "mumbo jumbo" of some self-help books. It's a good book for people that are married, dating or single wanting to learn more about their dating behaviors. I would highly recommend this book.